Good manners - **** off, I’m British!

I've just read a very interesting piece by Alex Gazzola http://mistakeswritersmake.blogspot.com/2011/05/mistake-no-48-no-thank-you.html on the failure of writes to say 'Thank you' for assistance provided.

This left me considering the lack of manners which seems to be becoming commonplace in our society.

The English (or the British) have a world reputation for good manners and a sense of fair play. But do we deserve it?

Walk through any city or town centre and you can expect to be pushed, shoved, sworn at and looked at with contempt for no obvious reasons. People show no consideration for others – they will gather in doorways and aisles without any concern for the people trying to get by. Ask them (politely) to let you by and you can often find yourself treated like a nuisance.

The shop assistants are frequently rude, ignorant or plain unwilling. If they don't like people they should work elsewhere or remember they are being paid to serve. I think this is part of the problem – the idea of serving someone suggests they are better than you. Most young people now regard themselves as something exceptional – without considering any need to do anything to earn the title. Result? They look down on everyone else. Unfortunately, they no longer grow out of this attitude as they grow older.

Too many trashy TV shows highlight the sort of attitude teenagers emulate. The plethora of 'reality' shows encourage teenagers to expect everything handed to them. They don't see a need for manners – "only losers say please!"

I was taught to say please and thank you, open doors for people, etc. Now I'm frequently looked at with contempt – if the person even acknowledges me at all!

Our society has changed from one with clearly defined class lines to one with opportunities for anyone to improve their situation – provided you have the necessary talent, work hard and get the breaks.

This is a good thing.

Unfortunately, it also seems to have taken away any desire to show respect to anyone. Not so good...

Our reputation around the world can no longer be that of good manners - visit any holiday spot and watch the rude behaviour of the British abroad. Instead we must now be seen as ill mannered hooligans.

I was going to continue to complain, but I think you get the idea. I know plenty of people (young and older) who have good manners, are polite and friendly – but we all know it is the unpleasant few who are always the most noticed.

Thank you for stopping by.

Bully? Not me - I'm famous!!

I was recently reading an article on a certain foul mouthed chef when a question occurred to me. Exactly when did the famous British good manners and sense of fair play become replaced by appalling behaviour and cruelty?

I don't watch  so called 'reality' TV (although it certainly doesn't reflect any reality I'm aware of), nor do I care for  the many 'talent' shows currently infesting the channels, so I'm perhaps ill placed to discuss this issue.

However, it seems to me, we have permitted the popular culture to be taken over by bullies and yobs. TV shows seem to want to humiliate participants for the pleasure of the overpaid, over-hyped and often talentless host. 

Why do the public go on these shows, knowing how they'll be treated? Simple - they are willing to be used and abused in the desperate hope they will be plucked from obscurity and awarded the keys to the world of fame and fortune. Some even manage it for a while, although they are often still used as a punchline...

I know someone who applied for the X-Factor. They are an accomplished singer who, a few years ago, came third in a BBC amateur singing contest (first and second went to people who had previously held recording contracts). They didn't make it through the first round of auditions.

Most of the people being chosen to go through were those most likely to provide the judges with the opportunity to laugh at them. A few lucky, talented performers were selected, but the  main goal was to provide fodder for the bullies.

The Weakest Link features a deeply unpleasant woman who cruelly mocks her victims between rounds. Her apparent superiority appears based on nothing more substantial than a BBC contract and assured payment at the end of the episode. She is reputed to fly into a rage if anyone dares stand up to her. In any other environment this would be considered bullying in the workplace and open to legal action. In showbusiness it is regarded as 'entertainment'. 

There must be something deeply wrong with anyone who feels the need to be so nasty to people - even worse is the fact they are not only permitted to behave in this way, but the victim is restrained from defending themselves. 

Some of these programmes now encourage the audience to join in with the bullying by shouting down the 'victim'. This seems very reminiscent of Ancient Rome and the gladiatorial battles. The gladiators (or the Christians) were there to be sacrificed to the public desire for entertainment. They were offered the very slim chance to succeed and gain their freedom and some form of riches (much like the contestants of today) although their true purpose was to feed the hunger for blood of the audience.

Perhaps it should be remembered the Games were introduced to take the public's mind off of the problems of the state. No-one seems to bay for blood during the good times - only when times are hard. These bullies and yobs belong in a different world to the rest of us. 

Most of us will have seen the recent 'war of words' on a writing forum between a disgruntled writer and a reviewer. The behaviour of the writer was that of a spoiled child having a tantrum. This led to a high number of comments criticising (quite rightly) her behaviour. If only as many people were as vociferous about all the high profile bullies in the modern media. 

It's time we reasserted our right to a decent and caring society and take the bullies toys away. Remove them from our screens until they can demonstrate the ability to behave like decent members of society.

Unfortunately, I suspect, the public thirst for blood - both real and figurative - is now so ingrained we are stuck with this 'entertainment' for the foreseeable future. 

Perhaps Stephen King's Running Man isn't fantasy but foresight...